People around me are saying they don't like Valentine's Day. (Oh, not at work. At work we love Valentine's Day!) But people in general - my nail lady and neighbor. I even a group of girls outside of the yoga studio complaining that it's a a "Hallmark holiday" laden in social pressure, unrealistic expectations and gross consumption. I'm guessing their boyfriends are poor. My friend's husband even said Valentine's Day is an expensive waste of money and whined about being forced to show your love in socially acceptable ways. "If I love her I should be able to show it whenever I want!" "And if you actually did so, we probably wouldn't need Valentine's Day," I retorted. And so on and so forth. I agree, there are gross things about it - overpriced roses, high caloric consumption and even more so, the way Hallmark's cash-cultivating holiday has spread Eastward retaining the material pressure but leaving the message of love behind. For real, you think dudes here have pressure? Try living in Ghana. I'd argue it's no different than Christmas in that regard and possibly better because of the whole love thing, but Christmas has Jesus. You know how people get over Jesus.

Is a day that you are given free reign to tell people that you love them even so bad? Sure for people who have trouble expressing their emotions and pent up resentment because they had their hearts broken and now use maladaptive defense mechanisms to ward them against expressing their authentic selves and, and blah, blah, blah. But really? So once or twice or several times you were burned by something disguised as genuine love. A cheating boyfriend. An evil stepmother. A negative nelly of a friend. That doesn't mean you can't be and won't be genuinely loved. I actually think that having your heart broken is good for you. That raw and exposed feeling allows you to to be in touch with yourself in a manner otherwise hard to recreate. Feeling heartbroken means you tried for something. Albeit the something seemingly failed; but that emptiness is space that can be filled with something so great.  Have I digressed or is this still relevant? Anyway, without sounding so preachy and cliche or whatever, use the day to focus on the positive, love-filled aspects of your life and tell those people how special and loved they are.

And in that light, I want to thank my boyfriend for not being at all not even a little bit someone who complains about Valentine's Day and using every chance he can get to make me feel special and loved. And my parents for at one point loving each other enough to create me and then my step parents for showing my real parents that they can again love. And to thank my brother for continually reminding me that humans aren't the only creatures who need love, but dogs and deer and turtles too. For the sake of your sanity, I'll skip everyone else and just say that for a snippy, sometimes sarcastic, maybe a hint snotty and a teeny tiny bit bossy girl, I am also quite loving. Should you feel lacking there in this Valentine's Day, please feel free to give me a holla because I have plenty of sugary love to go around.

Emma Dinzebach